Best Gifts for Elderly Parents in Assisted Living

You want to get your mom or dad a gift that sends a clear message: You are thinking of them. But then you go in there, and it’s so tiny. The nightstand is stuffed. The closet holds maybe half of what it used to. You just know you don’t want to give your parents a present that winds up buried in a closet or, god forbid, gets tucked away in the donation box since there’s no room for it.

Gifts for your parents in assisted living require a bit of care. The perfect present not only fits the room, is easy for them to handle, but also proves that even if their life looks different than it did before, they’re still the heart of the family.

These are the presents you really want to get. (And some you shouldn’t).

What Is a Good Gift for Parents in Assisted Living?

Before you hit the shops and start shopping, there are a few realities about the rooms in these facilities. Most facilities will have 200 to 400 square feet of space in their private rooms, think a big hotel room. Rooms for two people have even less space.

Each and every one of the gifts your parents get will need to earn a spot.

Make sure that when you select the present, it:

• Fits in your parents’ room: Can it go on the nightstand, a shelf, or on their lap? If it takes up floor space, it’s likely too big.
• Works with your facility rules: Most communities do not allow open flames, limit some foods, and some even restrict appliances. Contact the front desk before ordering.
• Matches your parents’ physical abilities: Be sure to consider things like grip strength and eyesight. That nice journal your dad or mom loves might be useless if having a pen in their fingers is an issue due to arthritis.
• Meets your parents’ emotional needs: The best gifts for parents do more than one thing; they also address the things your parents aren’t saying: “I miss being connected and having a purpose. I need to know I’m remembered.”

If the gift you’re considering hits all four of these items, it won’t just rest in their room; it’ll help them make it through the day.

Gift Your Mom or Dad Some Comfort

A space is made into a home through warmth and familiarity. Some of the best gifts to give a mom or dad are the ones that make them comfortable and help their room feel cozy.

• A soft lap blanket: A throw is great for home or at your parents’ apartment, but in their room, you’ll be better off with a smaller blanket that they can lay across the lap while they are sitting in the recliner or wheelchair, or laying down. Fleece is warm without being heavy or bulky. Personalized blankets with a print of the family picture are great as they double as a comfort piece and a reminder of home.
• Slippers with a non-slip firm sole, Falls are the most common cause of injury for adults 65+, per the CDC. Look for slippers with a rubber bottom that grips and a back that won’t fall off the heel. Avoid scuff slides as these are a tripping hazard.
• Good hand and body lotion, Older skin tends to be drier, and the standard lotions in most facilities are just that, standard. Go unscented or lightly scented in a pump bottle that is easily used with stiff fingers.
• A weighted blanket (5-10 lbs.), Weighted blankets have been proven to be effective for helping with insomnia and anxiety, according to a study published in the Journal of Clinical Sleep Medicine. Pick one that is roughly 10% of their body weight. Always run it by their care team first, especially if they have respiratory or circulation problems.

If you’re not sure, go with something that will improve their physical comfort. Who could begrudge a warm blanket?

Gifts That Keep Them Connected to Their Family

Social isolation is the silent plague of assisted living. Research from the National Institute on Aging shows that being socially isolated for long periods increases the risk of dementia by as much as 50 percent and increases the risk of heart disease by 29 percent. Gifts that keep a continuous thread of connection active do more than make them happy, they help keep them healthy.

• Digital photo frame (pre-loaded and pre-connected), The key word here is pre-loaded. Don’t give them a frame and expect them to figure out the Wi-Fi sync. Load up their favorite pictures on it yourself, and set it up to connect to a shared photo album. Now new photos will automatically appear when a family member uploads a picture. The Aura and Skylight frames are two popular options that allow families to upload photos directly from their phones.
• Custom family photo calendar, A year’s worth of smiling faces. Most print-on-demand sites (Shutterfly, Mixbook) allow you to add birthdays and anniversaries to specific days of the month so your parent never has to miss them.
• Stationery set with pre-stamped, pre-addressed envelopes, Just fill in the family members’ addresses on the envelopes, and include a nice pen with a comfortable grip. You’ve just removed the last barriers to them sending handwritten notes.
• Monthly family newspaper, A printed family newsletter full of updates, photos, and the kids’ latest drawings gives your parent a whole new publication to read each month, plus a fresh talking point for their friends in the living room. Hug Letters are an incredible service that print and mail your family’s newspaper right to your parents’ door. Everyone in the family can write updates and upload photos from their phones, and then your parent receives a printed newspaper every month, that they can read, enjoy, and share with others.
• Tabletop photo frames only, Hanging photos on the walls of a communal living space can be a challenge. Instead, select frames that stand on the nightstand or dresser, perhaps even with easel backing. Every few months, swap them out with new photographs.

In a word: give the appearance and presence of family members in a way they don’t need to figure out how to use technology to see.

Entertainment and Brain-Stimulating Gifts

Lack of stimulation can become an issue for an assisted living resident. This is especially true for people who were active and independent in the past. The right entertainment gift will give the resident something to look forward to, and it will help keep their mind stimulated.

• Large-puzzles books, These types of activities (crosswords, word puzzles, sudoku) are some of the most requested gifts. It’s recommended to get a large-print book. Make sure the book is for seniors, and has larger print with a big space to write on.
• Audiobook player or service, Sometimes, reading just gets to be too hard. Audiobooks will allow your resident to continue to enjoy listening to a good book. An Audible subscription paired with a simple tablet, or you can choose a special player made for listening to audiobooks. Make sure you pre-load some of the books for them, so they can get started on a book right away if they like.
• Puzzles (300-500 piece), Try to get puzzles that have large pieces. Pick pictures that have meaning: a hometown scene, a vehicle from their generation, or a favorite painting. 1,000 piece puzzles are typically too overwhelming for a small space (and stiff fingers).
• Portable radio or loaded music player, This is a great way to activate deep memory. According to the Alzheimer’s Association, listening to familiar songs and tunes may help reduce agitation and improve their mood, even in those who have a significant level of dementia. A simple MP3 player can be loaded with their favorite songs and music, or, if it’s more practical, get a radio and make sure it’s programmed with their favorite music station.
• Adult coloring books with good colored pencils, Pick designs that aren’t too fine or small. Gel pens or thick colored pencils may work much better with arthritic hands than a regular marker.

If your parent has dementia or significant memory problems, check out our guide to best personalized gifts for grandparents with Alzheimer’s for a few more suggestions!

Functional Gifts for Daily Living

Not every gift needs to be a keepsake. Sometimes the best gifts are those that make a small daily task a bit easier or more enjoyable for your loved one.

• Adaptive apparel, Adaptive options may include clothing that features magnetic closures, clothing that has stretchable waistlines, or other features that may help your loved one dress independently without the loss of their dignity. Silverts and Buck & Buck are great companies that offer fashionable adaptive clothing for seniors.
• A lighted magnifying glass, Helps with medicine labels, mail, the TV remote, etc. Get a model with LED lighting and an easy-to-hold handle.
• A low-maintenance small plant, A pothos, snake plant, or a succulent adds a little life and color to any room, without requiring daily watering. Studies also show that plants can help reduce stress, improve the air quality. Just be sure you pick something that won’t end up in a high-traffic zone.
• A big wall calendar, The kind with big boxes, large numbers. Help them mark birthdays of loved ones, days to expect visitors, activities offered at the facility. Helps bring some structure to the days, a sense of what’s to come.
• A nice bathrobe, Something they probably won’t get themselves but will happily wear every day. Look for something lightweight made of waffle, terry cloth, or the like, preferably with wide sleeves so they can easily slip it on.

Practical doesn’t mean “dull” or “boring”. It means you’re really looking at what the day-to-day life of that resident actually looks like.

Easy-To-Use Technology Gifts For Assisted Living Residents

Technology has a lot of potential to change the game for seniors in assisted living, but only if you actually set it up and explain how to use it. You wouldn’t walk into their home with a new iPad sitting in its box and say “happy birthday!”, would you? Instead, give them an iPad that’s already configured, with large buttons and a few family photos that are ready to view at a tap.

• A pre-configured tablet, Set it up with a simple home screen, easy-to-read icons for FaceTime, your photo collection, and a couple of other apps like a news reader. Get rid of anything confusing. If they don’t know much about technology, take a look at this helpful article first to get ideas before you hand off the gift.
• A smart speaker, A Amazon Echo or Google Nest are great because you can give your parent an opportunity to listen to music, ask about the weather, set a timer for medicine, make calls to loved ones, all with just their voice. Perfect for seniors with impaired eyesight, weak movement in the fingers, and so on.
• A dedicated video calling device, If a senior really likes the face-to-face chat, but can’t figure out a tablet or phone, there are devices like the Amazon Echo Show or Facebook Portal that are designed specifically for that purpose, with large screens and big buttons. Also, note that some facilities don’t have Wi-Fi, so if you go this route you’ll want to be sure your parent is in a space that has good access. Otherwise, a GrandPad or similar cellular device can bridge that gap.

Remember: if you can’t stay around to help troubleshoot in that first week or two, it’s probably too complicated to give it.

Gifts Delivered Monthly

A one-off gift is certainly appreciated, but having a monthly surprise can be far more special and even meaningful. Recurring gifts also help to reduce loneliness for parents in assisted living since they add a regular touchpoint between visits.

• A magazine subscription, Large-print versions of Reader’s Digest, AARP The Magazine, or a magazine based around a hobby will offer a fresh stack of reading material every month.
• A monthly snack or treat box, Many companies offer monthly snack boxes. Pick one that will work for any dietary restrictions. Some facilities require all food items to be picked up at the front desk, so ask first.
• Monthly family photo prints, Services like Chatbooks send a little photo book each month pulled from your phone’s camera roll. It’s an easy way to keep sending photos.
• A family newsletter subscription, Hug Letters will send a printed family newspaper every month so your parent always has something new to read and share with their neighbors. Everyone in the family will contribute updates from their phone, and your parent will receive an actual printed newspaper.
• An audiobook credit, One new book a month will keep your parent entertained for weeks and won’t take up physical space.

For a more comprehensive list of recurring gift ideas, review our article about the best subscription boxes for seniors.

What NOT to Bring to Assisted Living

While knowing what to give is essential, it’s equally important to know what to steer clear of. There are some thoughtful gifts that can cause more issues than they are worth:

• Candles or anything with a live flame, Most facilities won’t allow them. You should feel OK bringing flameless LED candles or wax warmers though.
• Large decor or furniture, That beautiful floor lamp or side table you picked up at HomeGoods will make a 300-square-foot room seem smaller. Look for things that fit onto current surfaces.
• Strong fragrances, Strong perfume, scented candles, and potpourri might set off headaches, respiratory issues, or allergies for others. If you want to add fragrance, try something more subtle and hypoallergenic.
• Complex electronics without setup, A tablet, smart speaker, or picture frame arriving in its original box will likely stay in its box. Set up and test all technology beforehand.
• Food that will spoil and hasn’t been checked beforehand, Facilities are usually careful about dietary restrictions and will require food to be logged. Make sure to call before sending a cookie tray or fruit arrangement.
• Things that feel clinical or patronizing, Safety information, medical alert pamphlets, or products that say SENIOR on the outside. Your parent understands their life. They don’t need a gift to remind them. When it comes to what to get, focus on things that make their life a little warmer, a little less dull, and a little less lonely.

FAQ

What is the best gift to give someone in a nursing home?

When choosing gifts for residents of assisted living or nursing homes, remember to keep the present compact, personal, and simple. Some items that are always winners include a digital picture frame pre-loaded with pictures of family and friends, a lap quilt, or a word search book with giant print. Some parents and grandparents love regular gifts that arrive on a monthly schedule. This might include a copy of your own family newsletter, or a photo book you create just for them. According to the National Institute on Aging, gifts that help to bridge the gap of loneliness and distance are especially powerful.

How much should I spend on a gift for someone in assisted living?

There is no right or minimum spend for gifts for assisted living or nursing home residents. A box of five-dollar fancy stationery, with pre-addressed and pre-stamped envelopes, can mean the world, as can a $200 gadget that never sees the light of day. Some of the best gifts run between $15 and $75. What matters far more is whether your gift fits into a small living space, whether the elderly person will be able to use the gift as it was intended, and most importantly, whether your parent is aware that their family and friends are thinking about them.

Can you send gifts to nursing homes and assisted living facilities?

Yes! Most nursing home and assisted living facilities accept deliveries. Make sure to include your parent’s name and a room number. Double-check with their facility’s front desk for any rules regarding the delivery of food, plants, or appliances. Most nursing homes will need to check a package at reception prior to giving it to your parent, which might mean that they’ll get the package a day or so later than it gets to the facility.

What are some good gifts for parents with dementia in assisted living?

It is always best to stick with gifts for dementia residents that stimulate the five senses. A soft quilt, a digital picture frame with images of their grandchildren playing, a simple fidget quilt, or a personalized book of photos of familiar faces are all great choices. Always avoid small pieces, difficult instructions, or other hazards that could be difficult to manage. For more great gift ideas for parents with cognitive impairments, see our full article on personalized gifts for grandparents with Alzheimer’s.

Wrapping It All Up

In summary, great gift ideas for elderly parents or grandparents living in senior care communities and nursing homes aren’t so much about the price tag and the gift card and a fancy bow. These thoughtful gifts for your parents are about showing your parent that even though they had to leave your home and family behind, they are still very much part of it. A cozy blanket that smells like a parent who cares. A picture that changes out with a weekly schedule. A newsletter that proves the grandkids have grown, and the family is still a family.

If you are feeling stuck in how to bring fun and meaning to your visits with aging parents, simply bring a gift along on each of these visits. It gives you something to do together, something to talk about, and something that stays out in the home long after you are both back on your own.

Don’t forget, your parent may be used to not getting much. But that is precisely why what you bring is so significant.